Put me in line for disaster,
The night I promised you my heart.
A simple smile is all it’ll take
And we’ll be on the road to success.
How do I explain this? I can’t.
I’ve watched you –
Worshipped you. You
Keep me awake all night
Tossing in the fevered glow
Of the sullen, jealous moon.
Sliding towards you, always you.
My thoughts, heart, hands, not my own.
A passing melody.
A catchy tune.
My soul sings you, cries you.
I bleed, I crawl, I die. I can’t.
A sighing sound –
You, breathing in my ear.
I try to claw it out of me. I can’t.
I need, I want. Always you.
Denial and still no peace.
An ugly word – an ugly truth.
Personal, in my dreams, a tear
Screaming inside myself
Fist pressed in my mouth to stop. Stop
You. Still, always, there.